Got Milk??

Milk as a beverage? Sounds normal to most of you I am sure but, if you knew my family whilst we were growing up you found that milk, despite it having all characteristics of a beverage, is not.
My parents are nuts. This is something that over the years I have come to embrace and enjoy. Every once in a while their brains will come up with something that goes down in history.

As teenagers we were, I think, normal in our milk consumption. We poured it over cereal and dunked our duplex cookies into it. I think we even dared to consume it out of a glass on occasion.

My father, who arrived home often to find the milk jug empty, just lost it one day and gathered all us kids together for a talking to. We dragged ourselves to the family room filled with dread. What had our parents found out we had done? Each of the four of us ran through what must have been a million scenarios in our minds. My father was angry. You could see it from the little vein on his neck that was pulsating. I was just sure we were busted. He stood before us and we prepared for the worst. He chastised us for being ungrateful and selfish and with empty milk jug in hand declared,

"Don't drink milk as a beverage!!!!"

What?? We each looked at each other puzzlingly. Did we dare laugh? Was he making a joke. And then one of my brothers said it. What we had all been thinking but had been too afraid to say.

"Well, what should we drink it as?"

That was all it took. My father stormed off in a fit of rage and refused to speak to us. We all had a hearty laugh and to this day all crack up whenever we pour ourselves a tall glass of milk.